Truth is

...I didn't really know you. I caught you at a time where, we were nothing but mere passing ships. As much as I try to shut off the chapter it gets harder, but thank god for memory loss.

Sometimes I think I pity myself too much, when I start reminiscing about the fun and all and then I realize that I can't have it again, no matter how much I want to. That's when it really hits hard and hurts. To realize again that I sometimes have to physically and actively stop myself from contacting him. I guess it's a training thing.