Delirious

Have you ever had days where you're forced to slow down and just live in the day? Where ambitious goals seem like light years away and you're torn between the thought of "If I were in the future looking back, what would have happened?"

Envisioning.

Adversity

Ann Arbor May 2011

Adversity brings out people's true characters. How do you act when you're under pressure? When people annoy you or just plain make you angry? Is this then reflective of your personality fundamentally? Perhaps.

Challenges and finishing them. Nothing like it. NST Street Race, you kicked my ass. But man, it was a good challenge and plenty of people cramping out along the way. I havn't ached like this probably since DOE Silver and Gold.

Catching up with people half way across the world in 12 hour different timezones. I miss everyone :(. But slowly an acceptance that life evolves and you meet new people, all the time.

I often re-read my blog posts as though I were someone new. Every single day brings something different and who can ever predict what comes next? What we decide to do next, where we decide to go next?

Snapshots

Short reminder to myself that I don't want to snapshot my life and find out it hasn't changed from Point A to B to C.

2012 Wants-The Update

-Green Silk Pleated Dress

-Urban decay palette
-New bikini
-Restful holiday

-A good read

-Massage in Bali

-Exploring new places
-New Cifs
-Europe travels (SOON)
-New office gear
-Wallet
-Cambridge Satchel
-Nude pumps
-Flowy, chiffon skirt
-Anything in pastel turqoise sea-green blue
-Glittery nail polish 
-Walkable Wedges
-Flats

给自己的歌

想得却不可得 你奈人生何 　　
该舍的舍不得 只顾著跟往事瞎扯 　　
等你发现时间是贼了 　　
它早已偷光你的选择 　　

爱恋不过是一场高烧 　　
思念是紧跟著的好不了的咳 　　
是不能原谅 却无法阻挡 　　
恨意在夜里翻墙 　　
是空空荡荡 却嗡嗡作响 　　
谁在你心里放冷枪 　　

旧爱的誓言像极了一个巴掌 　　
每当你记起一句就挨一个耳光 　
然后好几年都问不得闻不得女人香 　　

往事并不如烟 　　
是啊在爱里念旧
也不算美德 　　
可惜恋爱不像写歌 　　
再认真也成不了风格 　　

我问你见过思念放过谁呢 　　
不管你是累犯或是从无前科 　　
我认识的只有那合久的分了 　　
没见过分久的合 　　

岁月你别催 　　
该来的我不推 　　
该还的还 该给的我给 　　
岁月你别催 　　
走远的我不追 　　
我不过是想弄清原委 　　
谁能告诉我这是什么呢

To be grateful

We are always constantly reminded to be happy with what we have, materially and spiritually. It doesn't take much to be reminded how important this is. From seeing the homeless sleep in the center of kl city, to hearing people worry about affording houses and starting families, to global riots caused by jobless youth read in magazines of airport lounges.

Today reminded me why I should not complain about life. That right now I am happy, satisfied with where I am. Yet this is not an excuse for not chasing dreams, rather it acts more as a counterbalance so that I don't fly too high above reality and end up thinking my life is so tough.

Never forget this time of youth, where every opportunity lies ahead of you. Yet also do not be disheartened by failures or disillusions. Life is good, life is what you make of it. Cry if you have to, smile all the time, let things go, show people you care for them without thought of return.

Feel, because then you know you are human. Life has been busy, I have solid plans for the next 2 foreseeable months. And this keeps me active and looking forward. You need that, to stay alive to stay in control and relevant. Streets race, ong shunmugam cheongsam, titanic 3d, tennis, bootcamp, tango, work, Italy.

The guardrails are starting to come up again, because, when you let everything go, you realize how far you can fall.

Traveltimes

Your April Monthly Forecast: The world is full of commuters. People making the same old journey, to and from the same old place, day after day. Even those of us who do not travel so much frequently retrace the same old psychological steps. What will April bring you? Another trip around the same old circuit? Or a magical mystery tour? Are you ready for a joyous discovery? Are you anxious lest it comes at the expense of a tense experience or a brush with unnerving uncertainty? Don't fear that! Indeed, don't fear anything. This is where life gets interesting and... pleasing.

Kinda agree, April has been a month of letting go. Wanting to break out from the norm for a little, which is what I've been kinda doing. Good luck to myself!

In other notes, that transition from strangers to friendship? Sometimes it goes backwards too. Especially to the people you hold closest. How stupid. Maybe you really don't know someone at all, no matter how much you give yourself over to them.

Discontentment

There's this growing feeling of emptiness, like a gaping black hole that I'm running away from day in and day out. As much as I want to fill it with things there just aren't enough things. I havn't been in a calm state of mind for the longest time and I still am not.

I'm never really satisfied where I am, am I?

"It's funny how the words we never say, turn into the only thoughts that we know."

Weekend Review

Distance isn't just merely measured in miles or kilometers. It's measured in experiences, choices and changes. Watching The Vow this weekend got me thinking that if I ever rewound myself in time and found myself in the mental state of say, 15 year old me, 18 year old me, or 21 year old me, I don't think I've actually changed too much. Or maybe I have and I just havn't noticed it. After all change is probably dictated more by the people around you and your interactions that tell you 'you dance different', or, 'you look different'.

A 2 hour flight, or even 20 hour flight seems like nothing, it's only x hours of your life. But what's waiting in the reunion at the end is often far more than the effort that it takes monetary and time wise. It's a will to want to see that person at the end of the line, who might now be no more than a stranger to you. And maybe then you separate the true friends from the ones that were nothing more than fleeting meetings, no matter how much they once meant to you at that point in time.

And sometimes you find yourself in 'surreal, but nice' moments. Where it seems like time stood still and you're back to 16 year old you laughing over memories. Things never change.

Who do you really want by your side?

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let us down, probably will. You'll have your heart broken and you'll break others' hearts. You'll fight with your best friend or maybe even fall in love with them, and you'll cry because time is flying by. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, forgive freely, and love like you've never been hurt. Life comes with no guarantees, no time outs, no second chances. you just have to live life to the fullest, tell someone what they mean to you and tell someone off, speak out, dance in the pouring rain, hold someone's hand, comfort a friend, fall asleep watching the sun come up, stay up late, be a flirt, and smile until your face hurts. Don't be afraid to take chances or fall in love and most of all, live in the moment because every second you spend angry or upset is a second of happiness you can never get back. - Author Unknown


Timely reminder on this monday.

Also this...

Sometimes we don’t thank our friends enough — for being there, for loving us, for being able to exist in the sidelines because of distance or schedules but come back into our lives with full force when the opportunity arrives. Our real friends, whose love and humor can lie dormant for stretches but doesn’t simply die, often go unappreciated. We owe them so much, and they are such a huge part of who we are, but we can often forget that as we construct our own lives. And we’ll surely make new friends as we grow — and are done stumbling into adulthood and everything that comes with it — but they won’t be a replacement, and we shouldn’t forget that. We owe it to ourselves to thank the people who have been there for us, and who remind us that we’ll always be worth more than just a handshake and an empty “we should grab a coffee soon.”
http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/a-thank-you-to-real-friends/