Thoughts chase each other until my fingers can no longer follow my stream of consciousness normally at two points in the cycle of the day and following certain reasons:
1) Exercised til I'm at the happy point of tiredness where I know deep sleep is the next thing going for me
2) In the darkness of the night
The masseuse told me when I complained about my 2nd toe hurting that it was my eyes being tired. I couldn't agree more. Maybe there is some truth to this malarky of feet reflexology, but he didn't need to tell me bout my shoulders being knotted, I knew that from the beginning. Too much hunching over, boy, I'm gna get back problems when I'm old....
Ruminating. Tango tomorrow, will see what happens. Went for 2 hr futsal with the Tams and the usual bunch. Always entertaining and I love how at the age of 11, they are still naive enough to be truthful about EVERYTHING they are saying/thinking. Soon to change as teenage years hit tho, and when their peers start to act cool. Ah...naivety of pre-teen years. I miss them.
What can I say about BCG. Blackhole for now. Limbo.
Life goes on eh? It does, memories get knocked out of your head, heartaches dissipate but sometimes they stab again, and sometimes its almost as though you have to pause, breathe, rewind and stop thoughts from running. Always running.
Damnit forgot what this was initially inspired from again...Oh yes, I cleaned my room. After 10 years. Finally decided I had it with things everywhere and just MESS. Cleared it out. Time to grow up. Time to effing grow up. Junk collects over time, funny thing bout cleaning the Ann Arbor apartment was just that, when we realize how much JUNK we own. Funny memory was the roomie trying to haul our combined notes and papers (mine starting from freshmen yr) down the stairs and the bag bursting. Oh the chaos.
It's when you have to move or decide what to bring with you on a 3 yr sojourn to the States and back, where you REALLY figure out what the most important things to you are. For me I could never leave behind my photos. Link to the past, reminder to yourself to never ever lose who you are to the core, defining moments in life, events passed, people who matter to you. When you desperately click click click. The fountain by the MLB, walking along a road, exploring North Campus. But what you miss at the end of the day is the mundane everyday tasks that you never take photos of. The food you cook for lunch and dinner, the moment where you're running out the door doing a mental checklist of bag, notes, homework, coat, gloves, double layered pants, scarf, thick socks, boots, ipod, handphone, keys, lipbalm, crap forgot the keys. The laughter and fun of random get-togethers over shisha, nail polish, mags, girly gossip, alcohol and cupcakes. The chaos of moving apartments, paying bills, standing in the middle of a Michigan winter waiting for the AATA bus to take you to do your social security number crap.
What those photos don't capture is the moment you realize you've grown up. They capture moments you believe to be important, moments that are unique. But they don't capture the beauty or simplicity of everyday tasks until one day it is over.
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